This note was written more than a week ago. I decided to try to translate it for all of you who doesn't know this incomprehensible polish gibberish. I miss all of you and I really wish to see you and to have you with me. In relations with people I'm really egocentric, wanted people to be with me. But I think if you have friends like those I have you feel the same...
Enjoy!
Have you ever
ask yourself, what were you doing a year ago on the same day, to which someone
has replied instead of 2 at the end of that year this nasty 3 number ? Cool ,
right? Yeeeeeeeeaaa cool, pity that we moved ahead during this year even though
no one actually wanted that.
A year ago,
exactly at 17:35 my plane was leaving to the place of which I knew nothing . When
I see myself now with from this position I just want to sit down and cry
bitterly . I was trying to find the best solutions for situations I had to
solve. Now I think about myself one year ago as a little orphan without anybody
by its side while got off the plane in Chania with 30 kilograms of luggage for
the next ten months of living in a place the name of which I could not even properly
stress .
"I was
so afraid of you" my grandmother said to me today. But I was not afraid
about myself. I think sometimes we worry about your life less than others do.
Do we ignore it?
The town
which was then a mystery to me , today I am able to walk with my eyes closed .
I once got lost on the streets , and today I recognize the smallest streets on
the pictures. How many times have our shoes left imprints on these roads ...
This is our street , and our house was a few meters behind the tree that blooms
in red. Here we went for frozen yogurt , and in front of the place was the best
pita in the city. To the right I drunk the best lemonade in my life , and
during the carnival we danced to Δεν
ταιριάζετεσου λεώ . Do I want to cry when I think
about it ? Yes. Yes, because I think that in this few months everything that people
may want was included. Meet people and share your time with them. Fill glasses with
good wine in the company of those with whom we have something to talk about or
just to be silent with. Bathing in the sea during dark night , lie on the
water and look at the stars. Dry up at the sight that was made by God . It can
not be erased from memory. But imagine the most important thing - how difficult
it is to forget about all the people born in foreign lands who were for us as
brothers and sisters , sometimes sacrificing their interest for our good.
I missed a
lot of things , but now I feel I have too many of them . I learned a minimalist
life . When we escaped from our old flat in the rain in the middle of the night,
in the morning we were awakened by the bright sun , but we did not have even a
cup , which would be possible to heat water for tea . Now I need less to be
happy, but paradoxically it’s harder to find that. It's been three months from the
date of weepy July 7 . I'm definitely a different person . I think we all are.
I lost my
love - space and the sea , but still people are with me . Once I promised this
dirty malakes thanks stating that it is not known yet whether they deserve .
You have done more for me than I could have imagined. Today I thank you , Anita
and Sebastian, for those wonderful months spent under the same roof at the same
table . And though at times we stood in front of difficult situations , I think
we have passed the test of being a small family. Thank you for all the good
that I do not deserve at all. I would like to wish you and us that we would
ever sit down together at the same time to our plastic garden table , which was
always dirty with food. To once again lean out the window and watch the people
walking our street , whose conversations was coming to us to our sweet first
floor . To just stare again at each other and smile silently , looking into
each other 's eyes and saw that the other person at this moment is the happiest
man on earth. And to be a mirror image of that person .
3 months in
place that is our homeland . The hardest two months of my life and it's not
because I no longer accustomed duties. I have not experienced so many problems
since I live, but what is the most important - I would not be able to deal with
them as if those ten months on Erasmus has not changed me as a person. This
time gave me the courage to fight for other people. To fulfill dreams. To make
difficult decisions . To cry for stroke, wipe the tears and fight to the end ,
battling bravely for my rights . Because how many times have we heard lately
about not susceptible life. And then invade our thoughts as we want our lives
to look like. Do you really want to do what are you trying to “build” now ?
Would we be happy in our life, being under the same roof with people with whom
we are now ? Is this life created by us, or does it have a shape of other people's
requirements , or the general social "because I have to", "because
it should be like that" ?
I feel that
there - 2294km on the south of my home - there is a piece of me buried under
the hot sand, which during June scorched our feet . Today, exactly one year after I opened
"the half- open door" there is a pouring rain from the early morning.
I was crying a bit I admit, but think about the next year as the next door that
have to show me something even better. I hope it will not be given to me to go
from the living room to the hall ...
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